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A toast may be offered in any setting and made to an individual or a group. Increase your confidence at your next social gathering by learning the ins and outs of this ancient tradition. Toasting to someone’s health or honor goes back to biblical times and can be found in most cultures including the Egyptians, Greeks, and Persians.

We could spend hours diving into every aspect of table do’s and don’ts, but I want to give you my top 13 tips that will help you navigate any social or business gathering with confidence.

When God knitted together our precious children before they were even born, I am convinced he also wove in their personalities, gifts, and a love language! The concept of “love languages” is that each of us expresses and receives love in a unique way. The five love languages identified by Gary Chapman in his bestselling book are: Touch, Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Quality Time, and Gifts.

When God knitted together our precious children before they were even born, I am convinced he also wove in their personalities, gifts, and a love language! The concept of “love languages” is that each of us expresses and receives love in a unique way. The five love languages identified by Gary Chapman in his bestselling book are: Touch, Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Quality Time, and Gifts.

Vacations are back on the calendar, and many people are crossing the country through our friendly skies. I thought a refresher on airport and plane travel might do us all a little good.

I heard the most interesting ad the other day. There is a company that offers private-type flights for the commercial world. They describe themselves as a “hop on jet service.” On their website it states, “The convenience of private air but at commercial prices.” I looked them up, and there was one flight from Dallas to Houston for only $99!

“Conflict is part of every marriage. Thirty-seven percent of newlyweds admit to being more critical of their mates after marriage. And 30 percent report an increase in arguments. Whether you argue does not determine the health of your marriage. Far more important than how often you argue is how you argue.

With Father’s Day coming soon, you and your family will be celebrating one of the most important men in your life- Dad. As a child, he was your hero, your protector, and your solid rock. Now that you are older, you admire him for all that he has done for you and you still look to him for advice and wisdom. Picking out the perfect gift for Dad is not easy!

School is almost out for summer! Many of us want to gift our child’s teacher something special at the end of the year for all the love, kindness, and patience they have poured out on our little ones. Being a teacher is not easy, and they are so deserving of our gratitude especially after this wild 20/21 school year! Some common go-to gifts you might have thought of are bath and body products, Starbucks gift cards and mugs, but below are some additional gift ideas your child’s teacher will be touched to receive:

School is almost out for summer! Many of us want to gift our child’s teacher something special at the end of the year for all the love, kindness, and patience they have poured out on our little ones. Being a teacher is not easy, and they are so deserving of our gratitude especially after this wild 20/21 school year! Some common go-to gifts you might have thought of are bath and body products, Starbucks gift cards and mugs, but below are some additional gift ideas your child’s teacher will be touched to receive:

Graduation is a pivotal point in a young person’s life. It is the beginning of a season of responsibility, coming of age, and independence. As these twenty-somethings are about to discover the meaning of “adulting,” here are some gift ideas that will no doubt be a blessing in your college grad’s new life.

If some of you are thinking, “I believe I have read this letter before,” you would be correct. Our son and daughter (in law) had a beautiful wedding ceremony planned for April of 2020. As with thousands around the country, they had to postpone the big event, but chose to hold a private covenant ceremony in our backyard. Well, we are finally celebrating their wedding vows, and it was on my heart to re-post the letter I wrote to my son last year. Some things have changed (he is now 25, not 24 as the letter states), but I hope you enjoy!

 I heard the most interesting ad the other day. There is a company that offers private-type flights for the commercial world. They describe themselves as a “hop on jet service.” On their website it states, “The convenience of private air but at commercial prices.” I looked them up, and there was one flight from Dallas to Houston for only $99! 

“We read a lot of articles and books about how to get through the engagement process, but no one ever talked to us about what it would be like the first year of our marriage. I wish we had known what to expect,” said one of the couples my husband and I mentor. This is a common comment, and if you find yourself having similar feelings, do not fret! You are not alone. The first year of marriage is fabulous, but it can also be difficult. Two people learning to become one does not happen overnight.

We all like to think we have good manners in marriage, but with the people that are closest to us, we can sometimes find ourselves slipping a bit. As stated by Cindy Grosso of the Charleston School of Protocol, manners are not about a bunch of rules. Manners are the outward manifestation of the condition of our heart. If we have a heart that loves, honors, respects, and cherishes our spouse, then these traits will show in how we behave.

Society is opening and people are resuming long overdue vacations. This is great news! I recently posted some tips on making your travels successful, but let’s focus on dos and don’ts of traveling with friends.

 

1. Boundaries: When traveling with others, set guidelines, boundaries, and expectations before leaving town. If you know you and your husband want one night to yourselves, express this up front. If a quiet breakfast in bed is necessary to start your day, see if this fits with the group’s schedule. 

  • Lisa Lou

Does God Care About Manners?




Having good manners is common sense. Learning to communicate those manners according to the rules of the road is what is known as etiquette. Put another way: etiquette is the language of manners.

Etiquette and social skills are more than knowing which fork to use at dinner. It is understanding the words to speak and when to remain silent. It is the comprehension that what our image says on the outside reveals who we are on the inside. It is grasping that we should treat others like we wish to be treated.

Do we enjoy receiving gifts? Then we should also know when to give gifts. Do we feel loved when someone sends us a handwritten note? Then we should also know when a handwritten note might be warranted. Do we like seeing someone talk with food in their mouth? Then maybe we should also close our mouth when eating.

Manners and social skills allow us to function smoothly within the world. When driving on the road, there are certain rules we all follow. We do this to avoid unnecessary collisions that can lead to pain and disappointment.

But what does God have to say about good manners?

  1. Put others first; show interest in others: Philippians 2:3-4; Romans 12:10; Matthew 22:39; Matthew 19:19

  2. Practice hospitality: 1 Peter 4:9; Romans 12:13; Titus 1:8; Hebrews 13:2

  3. Be thankful and gracious in all you do: Colossians 3:15; 1 Thessalonians 5:18; 3 John 14; Ephesians 5:20

  4. Be respectful to others and do not brag; always exercise restraint: Titus 1:8; 1 Corinthians 13:4-5

  5. Always think before you speak and imagine how your words affect those around you: Proverbs 15:23; 12:25; 25:11; James 1:19

  6. Treat others better than you treat yourself; always be humble; we are all equal in God’s eyes, so act like it: Philippians 2:3; Romans 2:11

  7. People with good manners display great giving with their time, money, and talents: Acts 20:35

  8. Do not be self-centered: Philippians 2:4

  9. Be kind and do not show contempt for others: 1 Corinthians 13:4

  10. Practice the Golden Rule: Luke 10:27

  11. Do not be selfish, rude or a complainer: 1 Corinthians 13:5-7; Philippians 2:14

  12. Lift others up with your words: Ephesians 4:29

  13. Be slow to anger and exhibit self-control: Proverbs 16:32; Psalm 37:8

  14. Keep your words simple and say what you mean: Matthew 5:37

  15. Do what you say: Ecclesiastes 5:4-5

  16. Fulfill your promises quickly: Deuteronomy 23:21

  17. Show discretion: Proverbs 11:22

  18. Respect your elders and serve others: 1 Peter 5:5; Leviticus 19:32

  19. Show good manners when in the company of those that do not believe like you do: 1 Corinthians 10:27

  20. To round out my top 20 list, how about adding the 10 Commandments! These are full of commands on how we behave, thus, how we display our manners and practice etiquette.

(Above verses have been paraphrased.)

The rules of etiquette may have changed throughout history, but manners have not. Why? Because manners represent the condition of our heart. Eleanor Roosevelt said, “If ever you find yourself in a situation in which following a formal rule would be manifestly unkind, forget it, and be kind instead.”

A favorite story that exemplifies this statement occurred when Queen Elizabeth II was hosting a dinner on her yacht in the South Pacific. The party was in honor of a local prince. During dessert the prince thought his finger bowl was his dessert bowl and proceeded to fill it with fruit, cream, and sugar. (Finger bowls are filled with water and lemon to clean your hands at the end of a meal.) The prince picked up his bowl to take a sip, suddenly realizing his mistake. Without hesitation, Queen Elizabeth picked up her finger bowl and took a sip, saving the prince from embarrassment. The Queen might have committed an “etiquette” faux pas, but the good “manners” she displayed were exemplary. (Story told by Paul Burrell: former Royal Butler to Queen Elizabeth.)

Cindy Grosso, owner of The Charleston School of Protocol, says, “Manners are not about rules. Never about rules. It has always been about being confident. Being able to handle yourself in all situations.” Understanding the language of manners (social skills and etiquette) is important to building the confidence needed to function successfully in the world around us.

If you are a mom with children in the home, I would challenge you to begin practicing simple social skill techniques. Why? For the simple reason of developing confidence in your children. When a student studies well for a test, they can say to themselves, “I’ve got this,” when stepping into the classroom. When an athlete trains diligently for a competition, he/she feels ready to meet the challenge when stepping onto the field. When we train and prepare our families to “speak” the language of manners, we give them a self-assuredness that they can navigate any social road they will inevitably find themselves on.

Our goal is not to burden our families with a bunch of rules, but to teach them how to think for themselves in each unique situation. We want to instill good manners, because as we have learned, manners are tied directly to the condition of our hearts. If we are pure and kind on the inside, we might still pick up the wrong fork at dinner, but the love that spills forth from our souls is what people will remember.

Together with you,

Lisa Lou